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Tuesday 19 May 2009

Martin flees the nest

If you pay close attention this afternoon, you might just spot something that hasn't been seen for close to 400 years; Mr Speaker, Michael Martin, being expelled from the House of Commons.
When he does, eventually and reluctantly, take his leave, his going will, no doubt, be marked by sober and heartfelt tributes to his worthiness, personal probity and dedication to Parliament and democracy.
As usual, the hypocricy and crocodile tears will serve only to highlight the Old Boy's club mentality of most MPs - even those of the female persuasion. Some of the names already thrown into the ring for consideration as his successor, doubtless by impartial friends and associates of the nominees, feature entrenched opponents of democratic government like Harriet Harman and serial expense fiddlers such as Ming Campbell. Who says that virtue has its own reward?
Anyway, back to Speaker Martin. Rarely can anyone have been less suited to a job. Martin was not merely ignorant of Parliament, its function or traditions ; he actually tried to make a virtue of his ignorance: As if being a product of the Gorbals, the trades union movement and Old Labour not only excused his ignorance but precluded him from acquiring any of the knowledge or understanding necessary to the role of Speaker of the House of Commons. The fact that George Thomas - Viscount Tonypandy - rose from an even more humble background to become universally acknowledged as one of the great modern Speakers was just one aspect of the history of his role that he, patently, failed to grasp.
Some old Labour apparatchiks wear their working class credentials like a shield. Martin used his as a bludgeon. Opposed by anyone capable of forming a coherent sentence, his instinctive reaction was to accuse them of snobbery. In this, he was enthusiastically aided and abbetted by other members of the Lowlands tartan mafia.
As soon as news of his imminent resignation leaked out, these Labour outriders were busying themselves on the political blogs on the Guardian and Independent websites. Their snide little posts stand out like dog turds on a snow-covered field. Predictably, they claim that Martin is a Skapegoat (sic) hunted down by a mob of howling cretins. Whether this refers to the Press or the public is not altogether clear.
The fact that he - along with Harriet Harman and one Gordon Brown - spent £2 million to try to prevent the expenses information being published is, apparently, neither here nor there. Poor old Michael is characterised as yet another good socialist crushed under the wheels of the right wing juggernaut.
Mind you, if Not So Flash Gordon and his friends start to use Martin's demise as an opportunity to draw one of their famous lines under events and "move on", then we all might just start to think of him as a convenient scapegoat. For, let none of us forget that the great Gordon has plenty to answer for on the expenses front; not the least why he needed to maintain a London home as well as a constituency home while living for 12 years in his grace and favour pad in Downing Street.
Now that Martin has had to fly from the House (couldn't resist that one) he might just feel inclined to reveal where some of Gordon's other bodies are buried. In which case, look out for an early promotion to the House of Lords and further and better opportunities for the lad from Glasgow East to feather his nest at the public's expense.